Deaths in Iraq

An interesting letter in the Australian Shooter Magazine this week,
which I quote: "If you consider that there has been an average of
160,000 troops in the Iraq Theater of operations during the past 22
months, and a total of 2112 deaths, that gives a firearm death rate
of 60 per 100,000 soldiers.

The firearm death rate in Washington , DC is 80.6 per 100,000 for
the same period. That means you are about 25 per cent more likely
to be shot and killed in the US capital, which has some of the strictest
gun control laws in the US , than you are in Iraq .

Conclusion: The US should pull out of Washington.

Unverified and lacks citation.

Thought this was a good email and something to think about. Very interesting comparison of statistics.

Laugh for the day

Laugh for the Day

You are on a crowded bus when you suddenly realize you need to fart.
The music is really loud, so you time your farts with the beat.
You let go about 5 strong and loud ones back to back.
After a couple of songs, you start to feel better as you approach your stop.
As you are leaving the bus, people are really staring you down, and that's when you remember...

You've been listening to your iPod.

Donations

A driver is stuck in a traffic jam going into downtown Chicago .

Nothing is moving north or south. Suddenly a man knocks on his window.

The driver rolls down his window and asks, 'What happened, what's the hold Up?'

'Terrorists have kidnapped Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton,Oprah Winfrey, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, Rosie O'Donnell, Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.

They are asking for a $10 Million ransom. Otherwise, they are going to douse them with gasoline and set them on fire. We are going from car to car, taking up a collection.'

The driver asks, 'On average, how much is everyone giving?'

'About a gallon.'

Who really loves you the most?

This really works...! If you don't believe it, just try this simple experiment.

Put your dog and your spouse in the trunk of the car.
Wait 1 hour.
Open the trunk.

Who's more excited to see you?

In more than 2000 years

What have we learned in 2,064 years?

"The budget should be balanced, the treasury should be refilled, public debt should be reduced, the arrogance of officialdom should be tempered and controlled, and the assistance to foreign lands should be curtailed lest Rome become bankrupt.

People must again learn to work, instead of living on public assistance." - Cicero, 55 BC

Evidently nothing

originally sent to me via email written by an unknown author

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I was later shown this link, which kind of diffused the fun out the email I posted above, but oh well.

http://message.snopes.com/showpost.php?p=570302&postcount=6

Apparently it is a false quote :-(

The Spoon

A lesson on how consultants can make a difference in an organization.

Last week, we took some friends to a new restaurant, 'Dave's Place,' and noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket.

It seemed a little strange. When the busboy brought our water and utensils, I observed that he also had a spoon in his shirt pocket.

Then I looked around and saw that all the staff had spoons in their pockets. When the waiter came back to serve our soup I inquired, 'Why the spoon?'

'Well, 'he explained, 'the restaurant's owner hired Andersen Consulting to revamp all of our processes. After several months of analysis, they concluded that the spoon was the most frequently dropped utensil. It represents a drop frequency of approximately 3 spoons per table per hour.

If our personnel are better prepared, we can reduce the number of trips back to the kitchen and save 15 man-hours per shift.'

As luck would have it, I dropped my spoon and he replaced it with his spare. 'I'll get another spoon next time I go to the kitchen instead of making an extra trip to get it right now.' I was impressed.

I also noticed that there was a string hanging out of the waiter's fly. Looking around, I saw that all of the waiters had the same string hanging from their flies. So, before he walked off, I asked the waiter, 'Excuse me, but can you tell me why you have that string right there?'

'Oh, certainly!' Then he lowered his voice. 'Not everyone is so observant. That consulting firm I mentioned also learned that we can save time in the restroom.

By tying this string to the tip of our you-know-what, we can pull it out without touching it and eliminate the need to wash our hands, shortening the time spent in the restroom by 76.39%.

I asked quietly, 'After you get it out, how do you put it back?'

'Well,' he whispered, 'I don't know about the others, but I use the spoon.'

- Original Author of Email is Unknown

School in 1957 vs. School in 2007

Scenario: Jack goes quail hunting before school, pulls into school parking lot with shotgun in gun rack.
1957 - Vice principal comes over, looks at Jack's shotgun, goes to his car and gets his own shotgun to show Jack.
2007 - School goes into lock down, the SWAT Team is called, Jack is hauled off to jail and never sees his truck or gun again. Counselors are called in to assist traumatized students and teachers.

Scenario: Johnny and Mark get into a fistfight after school.
1957 - Crowd gathers. Mark wins. Johnny and Mark shake hands and end up buddies.
2007 - Police are called, SWAT team arrives and arrests Johnny and Mark. They are charged with assault and both a re expelled even though Johnny started it.

Scenario: Jeffrey won't sit still in class, disrupts other students.
1957 - Jeffrey is sent to the principal's office and given a good paddling. Returns to class, sits still and does not disrupt class again.
2007 - Jeffrey is given huge doses of Ritalin. Becomes a zombie. Tested for ADD. School gets extra provincial funding because Jeffrey has a disability.

Scenario: Billy breaks a window in his neighbor's car and his Dad gives him a whipping with his belt.
1957 - Billy is more careful next time , grows up normal, goes to college, and becomes a successful businessman.
2007 - Billy's dad is arrested for child abuse. Billy is removed to foster care and joins a gang. State psychologist tells Billy's sister that she remembers being abused herself and their dad goes to prison. Billy's mom has an affair with the psychologist.

Scenario: Mark gets a headache and takes some Aspirin to school.
1957 - Mark shares Aspirin with the school principal out on the smoking dock.
2007 - Police are called and Mark is expelled from school for drug violations. His car is searched for drugs and weapons.

Scenario: Pedro fails high-school English.
1957 - Pedro goes to summer school, passes English, goes to college.
2007 - Pedro's cause is taken up by local human rights group. Newspaper articles appear nationally explaining that making English a requirement for graduation is racist. American Civil Liberties Union files class action lawsuit against the school system and Pedro's English teacher. English is banned from core curriculum. Pedro is given his diploma anyway but ends up mowing lawns for a living because he cannot speak English.

Scenario: Johnny takes apart leftover July 4th firecrackers, puts them in a model airplane paint bottle and blows up an anthill.
1957 - Ants die.
2007 - The ATF and the SWAT Team are called and Johnny is charged with domestic terrorism. DCFS investigates parents, siblings are removed from the home, computers are confiscated, and Johnny's dad goes on a terror watch list and is never allowed to fly again.

Scenario: Johnny falls during recess and scrapes his knee. His teacher, Mary, finds him crying, and gives him a hug to comfort him.
1957 - Johnny soon feels better and goes back to playing.
2007 - Mary is accused of being a sexual predator and loses her job. She faces three years in federal prison. Johnny undergoes five years of therapy.

Original Email Author is Unknown